Is there any room for a scenario where mature God-loving men who have joy in their salvation rise up as a unified group and approach their “leaders” in the confidence of who they are in Christ and say ‘uh, no, that is NOT the way we see God taking us.  We don’t WANT a path of hypocrisy (do as I say not as I do) and secrecy and the man-behind-the-curtain making all the decisions and taking none of the responsibility for the consequences?  Men who are willing to say, ‘we don’t want to talk with our feet, we want to talk about the Emperor’s ugly non-clothing’ and bring in TRUE servant-leadership, starting with serving you leaders by telling you the truth.’

We  share the same former church (same as Stunned, same liberated feeling after a lot of pain.)

If you need to talk with someone, here’s my uni email db604406@wcupa.edu  Sometimes sharing with someone that has had similar experiences helps.

BTW, your story will not pale in comparison.  It is yours.  Therefore it is important because it was your experience.   In most of our books, whatever happened to you is important  because it affected you  (contrary to what many of us have heard ol’ CJ say). And it is God’s story of freeing his people from religion and bondage.  You may not think that to us it will look like Him parting the Red Sea, but for those who were set free from our Egypt and brought into Christ’s freedom, it will appear just as glorious.  Share whenever you’re ready and comfortable with doing so.

Stunned

My former SGM church is starting to hemmorage. Much is going on.  Family meeting in a few weeks. It will be interesting.

Thanks to all here who take the time to help the hurting. You are doing God’s good work.

So, Cautiously Optimistic…are you maybe 5 hours north of Charlotte…at the regional (apostle’s) church?

The leaders I knew could be very charming.  It was so easy to fall under the spell of the way they presented themselves.  Yet, challenge them and off comes the “nice guy” image.  Anger and impatience appeared like magice.  Shocking.  This was my experience in the last days of our involvement in PDI.  Has that changed at all?

Cautious:  Be careful.  Deception runs rampant within SGM and it is SO easy to be deceived when you are sitting under these pastors.  Just ask me…….

Synonyms for cautious are: alert, all ears, cagey, calculating, chary, circumspect, considerate, discreet, forethoughtful, gingerly, hedging one’s bets, heedful, judicious, keeping on one’s toes, leery, on the lookout, playing it cool, playing safe, politic, provident, prudent, pussyfoot, safe, shrewd, taking it easy, taking it slow, tentative, thinking twice, vigilant, walking on eggs, wary, watchful, watching one’s step, watching out, with one’s eyes peeled.

I’ll be anxiously waiting for “more details,” especially if this is Brent’s former church.

I agree with Carole’s comment to Vida on the “We-are-fam-a-lee…” thread. Be VERY cautious of “words.” Walking the walk after the talk is the TRUE test of change. And it’s not just “walking the walk” for a short distance or duration to make everyone think you’re headed down a new path, when in reality you have no intentions of changing course. Unfortunately SGM is known for using such tactics.

Time will tell – it’s the proven test.

please share any/all details or info you can!

Congratulations on a year out.  (I feel like we should have a chip to give you like they do in AA.)

My first couple of years outside of Covenant Fellowship was HARD.  Sounds like you’re in a good place and I rejoice for you.  Yes, it will take a long time to trust a minister.  Don’t push yourself.  God will get you where He wants you when He wants you there.

I left Cov Fel back in the early 00’s.  Any chance you were there then?

KS, Cov Fel used to be known as the clique of all cliques.  We would all go to Celebration (remember those conferences when they spent all year trying to convince you that it was going to be the single greatest event of your year and afterward trying to convince you that it was?).  At each Celebration people I would chat with (I was the odd duck who actually spoke to people from other SGM churches) and they would complain about the kids from Cov Fel, how cold and snobby they were because they would only sit with “their own kind” in the cafeteria.  I thought, “These poor kids have no other example to follow.  Can’t blame them since their parents do the same thing.”

Betrayed, feel free to post to me if you’re interested in connecting with an old Cov Fel person.

Best,
Stunned

SGM’s “cultish exclusiveness” is the number one complaint/concern I’ve heard through the years.  It permeates through *EVERYTHING* SGMers do and speaks VOLUMES!!

I believe it contributes the most to their undoing, even moreso than polity.  It’s the reason the blogs took a life of their own.  You can’t treat people the way SGM and many of their members do and continue to get away with it – eventually there’s an “uprising.” 

I know a few that are aware of the complaints and try to appear  less exclusive.  They get out ocassionally and try to mix and mingle with the rest of the Body. They look like fish out of water – it’s quite obvious, and sad.   You can tell they’re struggling and can’t wait to get back with “their own kind.”

Enjoy the freedom!  I’m so happy for you.  It is a difficult road to walk but you aren’t alone. 

Ellie, it is sad about loosing friends after leaving sgm.  We lost all ours as well.  I’m glad you have at least one family you can still hook up with.