I think the best way to start is by introducing ourselves. We’re Jim and Carole (last name excluded because google loves my last name-not good for my business). You know who we are…
We were founding members of Frontlines Church, which began in 1996. We were on the founding leadership team, and I (Jim) signed the original incorporation documents. Frontlines was adopted by Sovereign Grace Ministries (then PDI) in 1999, and became Sovereign Grace Church of Titusville. Upon adoption by SGM, my wife and I revamped and led SGC’s children’s ministry and were trained to be care group leaders. We became care group leaders in 2001. I was hired by SGC in 2003 with an unspecified title, no job description, and undefined responsibilities. My range of activities included everything from creating the bulletin and answering the phone (some in the church thought that I was a secretary), to giving oversight to all media ministries (some in the church thought I was the tech guy), to pastoral counseling (some in the church that I was a pastor). My role was finally defined as director of Biblical Counseling 2 weeks before I resigned from SGC’s employment. Carole led SGC’s Women’s Ministry from January 2005 until October 2005, when we resigned from all formal ministry functions. We resigned from membership in SGC Titusville in June, 2006 and left the church.
We have created this blog, 2 years after we left SGC/SGM, after becoming aware that there are many who have experienced the effects of SGM’s authoritarian leadership style. We have heard similar (or worse) stories from people around the country who are in differing stages of detox. The experience has been gut-wrenching.
Our desire is two-fold. To provide a safe haven for those who have left, are considering leaving, or have thought about joining an SGM church. You are safe here, and will receive informed, loving answers to your questions. We want to provide a healing environment for those, who like us, are asking-”why and how did this happen?”, “how do we work though the many issues we are faced with?”, and “where do we go from here?”
A secondary desire would be to see reform within Sovereign Grace Ministries. To see pastors become servants rather than CEO’s. Our hearts ache as we see these men become increasingly arrogant while maintaining a very practiced humble demeanor, and we fear for them. Our hearts are hurting even more for the “sheep”, who live to serve their pastor, and have confused this with serving our Savior. We truly believe that this hinders the Gospel, and would pray the SGM leaders would be drawn to repentance.
June 7th, 2008 at 11:48 pm
Praying for the Lords blessings on your ministry, and His guiding hand on your lives.
WOOOOTAGE!! first post
June 8th, 2008 at 12:22 am
Thank you so much, Eric. We need it.
WOOOOTAGE!! First comment!
Thanks, bro.
Grace,
Jim
June 8th, 2008 at 12:31 am
Uh…wootage, second post
I have appreciated silently observing your thoughtful and mature posts on that other blog I frequent
- many praises to the Lord for the fruit you will bear for going forth and being obedient to what God is calling you to do here.
May the Lord make this a cyber-place of healing and discussion, and a reformative force in SGM!
Quotation
June 8th, 2008 at 12:33 am
Him Jim.
Sorry to hear about your experience. Praying for SGM overall and your former Sr. Pastor would be worthwhile; as they have written such a good theology of the mindset of the Senior Pastor; basing it upon the “Mind of Christ” model attitude Paul emphasized in Philipians 2.
June 8th, 2008 at 12:34 am
Hey Jim (aka In His Grip),
LOL…I saw your “spam” on Kris and Guy’s site.
The blog looks great!! I will be praying for you and Carole.
-Kindred
June 8th, 2008 at 12:59 am
Quotation,
Very kind-thank you!
Kindred,
Thank you for your post and prayers!
Victorious,
Please keep praying for SGM. They write and say many good things. Unfortunately, there is a great difference between what is said and what is done.
The SGM sr pastor mindset is completely Moses model. Much worse than CC.
Please stay tuned
June 8th, 2008 at 1:00 am
Jim & Carole
I am looking forward to reading your blog and comments. I hope that this blog succeeds in both areas of your stated purpose.
Steve
http://www.ikdg.wordpress.com
(I Kissed Dating Goodbye: Wisdom or Foolishness?)
June 8th, 2008 at 2:10 am
Hmm, might be bending your ear Jim, if you dont mind. We are in the midst of setting our system up and I want to make sure it is Elder Board led and not Pastor says so the Elders agree led you know. You might have some valuable insights into how to do this, if you dont mind talking with me.
Anyway
WOOOOOOTAGE!!!! 1st and 8th comment
June 8th, 2008 at 2:30 am
Congrats on the new blog…keep those posts coming
June 8th, 2008 at 2:34 am
Jim and Carole,
I am all too familiar with authoritarian/Moses Model. May God richly bless you and use you to accomplish His purposes.
June 8th, 2008 at 4:38 am
Jim and Carole,
Thanks for this site and the motivation behind it. It sounds like you want to care for God’s people and work for change in SGM. I really appreciate some of your comments on Kris and Guy’s site, so I followed your link here.
June 8th, 2008 at 8:25 am
I liked your comments about wanting to see reform in SG ministries. I totally agree. As someone myself who leans towards both charismatic and calvanism I think the attempt at a church(s) that incorporates both is unigue. I give SG credit for trying. However too much investigation and documentation now exists with shepherding/moses style gov’t leadership in churches is abusive.
Maybe if CJ and company step up to the plate others in many other denominations will follow suit. I really feel we are at some kind of crisis in this country regarding this and I fear God’s judgement for many especially those in leadership. I don’t like people who are ‘players’ and should know better. They face a stricter judgement. Too many people are getting hurt and not representing our Lord correctly.
June 8th, 2008 at 11:45 am
Hey Jim - you go brother! We need hundreds of sites like this to expose the lies of the enemy as being proliferated through SGM and it’s shepherding and authoritarian abuse. Praise God and may HE continue to reveal the truth….
June 8th, 2008 at 11:51 am
Thanks for setting this site up, Jim & Carole! I look forward to seeing what the Lord does here.
June 8th, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Jim and Carole,
I love the tree on your home page. This site can be like that tree, firmly planted by the water, offering shade to those who have been harmed by authoritarian churches. Grace to you both!
June 8th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
Concerned,
Hi ya! How goes the new life in freedom? I’ve been thinking about you!
June 8th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
Jim,
Would you be speaking of Titusville, FL? I grew up there!
June 8th, 2008 at 1:12 pm
Canary!
Titusville FL is correct.
Carole was born in Rockledge, and I moved to Rockledge in 1973. We lived in Port Saint John for 23 years and moved to Viera (just south of Rockledge) last year.
When did you leave Titusville?
June 8th, 2008 at 1:16 pm
Canary, Concerned, and everyone else:
Just for the record, side conversations are encouraged. There is no need to stay on topic or direct replies to Carole or me.
There are no rules here.
June 8th, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Steve, Guy, Kevin, MR, Sonya, Concerned, Ellie, and Canary-
I’m sorry for the group hug, but I wanted to thank each of you for your encouragement.
You have no idea what it means to us. This is going to get a bit ugly, as we lay the foundation.
We’re going to need you guys.
June 8th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Jim and Carole,
The site looks great! As others have said, the more sites, the better.
I appreciate your desire to provide both a safe haven for the wounded and a continuing challenge to current SGM leadership to take another look at their leadership style. Thank you for your courage in this work of service. God bless you!
You are in my prayers.
June 8th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
Hi Gracie!
Thanks for the encouragement! And for your many, many prayers for us… you are a Godsend, dear friend!!
June 8th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
Congratulations on this step of faith.
Consider us at the PP to be friends and co -workers in Christ.
We will help any way we can.
God’s best to you and all who come here for truth and healing.
June 8th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
WOW!
The response from all of you has been wonderful! Thanks to all of you! I’m kinda late to the party, but I have read each and every comment you guys have posted. Jim and I are absolutely overwhelmed by your kindness and support! Thanks for your encouragement… and for checking out our new blog!! Welcome!
June 8th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Michael,
As one of my present-day heroes of The Faith, you honor me with your presence here (and you know how I feel about pastor-worship).
My conversation with you was the tipping point that led to the creation of this blog.
If this place can accomplish 1% of what God has done through Phoenix Preacher (friends, check it out through my blog roll), I’ll feel like this is a worthwhile endeavor.
Thank you for your offer of help. As I’ve already told you, when it gets thick, you’ll be hearing from me.
Much Grace to you, my brother.
June 8th, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Jim, how do we email you or Carole at this site? I know you posted it somewhere but I can’t find it.
Thanks!
June 8th, 2008 at 4:53 pm
Never mind! Found it… :/
June 8th, 2008 at 11:53 pm
OOOH it is so hard to fight my urge to spam your site with my usual useless drivel.
Still Christianaudio.com has Pilgrims progress for download free this month
http://christianaudio.com/free_download.php
June 9th, 2008 at 7:42 am
Eric,
I like your drivel… just don’t get any on the carpet.
Seriously, I’d welcome your regular participation for 2 reasons-
1) The time will come when pastoral participation will be vital.
2) Your participation will lighten things up.
3) After I figure out how to enable avatars, your super model avatar will add some eye candy to a rather drab looking blog.
June 9th, 2008 at 5:37 pm
Theres a Pastor around?? Where? those types make me all nervousy.
If you goto gravatar.com it should have the wordpress addon for your site, I think anyway.
June 9th, 2008 at 5:48 pm
Here you go:
http://en.gravatar.com/site/implement/wordpress
June 9th, 2008 at 5:52 pm
Eric is a pastor, everyone-and one of the good guys.
He also has a pretty twisted sense of humor, which earns brownie points in my book.
Thanks for the tip, Eric. I have no idea what plug in I installed that disabled avatars. I’ll figure it out.
June 9th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
Eric and Jim,
In the other blog, we talked about the need for ex-SGM leaders to get involved,that it would give more credence to the experiences spoken of by ex-SGM members. It is good to hear that this is happening. You go guys!
June 9th, 2008 at 6:24 pm
Hi Eric!
So…you’re one of them pastor types, eh?
June 9th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
Just a poor country preacher, trading the Word for tithes in Chickens and Pigs.
Life is Good
June 9th, 2008 at 10:24 pm
Don’t forget spices! Wouldn’t it be funny to put a jar of cumin in the tythe basket?
June 11th, 2008 at 12:39 am
Sue,
Thank you for posting.
I’m pretty confident that they’ll see it.
June 11th, 2008 at 11:46 am
Jim… I love it. The first SGM pastor type guy to come out of the closet. uh… er… that didn’t sound so good. : )
>snicker<
Anyway… looking forward to more commentary by in his grip.
John Immel
AKA CharlesFinney349
June 11th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Hey John!
Good to “see” you! And we are (hopefully? Please?) looking forward to hearing your thoughts and input here!
(And your remark about Jim coming out of the closet… too funny!)
June 11th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
May there be many more.
June 11th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Yeee hawww…
Well, if you insist on having me heheheh… you may rue the day. tee hee…
Anyway… if it matters to one and all, I
June 11th, 2008 at 1:45 pm
Heyyyyyy, John!
Good to see ya!
June 11th, 2008 at 9:08 pm
John Immel!
How did I miss both of your posts?
Thank you for joining the party!
June 12th, 2008 at 4:42 pm
Hi Sue!
You said… “I have one request: is there a way to make the font bigger on the blog? My post-40 eyes struggle a little with the black background and the size of the letters.”
LOL!!! I have the same problem! I have my “big-eye” glasses that I have to use whenever I’m posting or reading here.
Jim and I are very new to this whole medium, but we are looking to improve this site for easier readability and easier posting… I personally have a hard time posting in this little bitty box. So we are in process of making it (hopefully) better, but we wanted to launch the blog on June 8th, and kinda had to make do and improve as we go.
Please bear with us… and don’t hesitate to offer suggestions! We love to hear other’s ideas!
Take care, Sue… I’ll “talk” to you later!